What is the meaning of life? How many times has that question been asked on this planet? I don’t want to delve too deep into this today because we all know this conversation has no end. Besides, I believe the meaning of life is different for all of us. I just wanted to comment because someone asked me a question yesterday.
I spend most of my days inside these walls working. Whether writing research notes for a novel, coloring a new piece of art, or just writing for this blog. I try my best to use every minute I have available to me in the day wisely. I am not going to lie, it’s hard to maintain focus at time because places like these tend to sap your strength and if you can’t find a way to push through, you can very easily lose yourself in the doing-nothing-productive lifestyle these institutions so readily provide.
A friend sat down at my table to talk the usual “war stories”, looking to burn time before yard. Stories repeated so often that the teller often forgets he’s told the very same story over and over again, and sometimes to the very same person. I wasn’t doing my best to pay attention because I was working on a new piece (besides you can only listen so many time to how a person got “fucked up”) and he eventually grew annoyed from a lack of enthusiasm so he stopped in mid-sentence to ask me, “Why don’t you ever take a break? It’s not like you can do much from this place anyway.”
I put my colored pencil down and said soberly, “No one is going to do it for me.” Then picked my pencil back up and got back to work.
There is always an excuse to put things off or to feel like there is no point to any of it. Maybe it’s just part of the human condition, I don’t know. There is always a choice though. But now that I have had a few years to get my head on straight, one thing has become very clear to me. Besides love, what other reason are we put here on earth, other than to do our very best at whatever we choose to be our purpose and to continuously push our limits in order to meet our full potential? The meaning of life is what you make it. Whether positive or negative, the choice is our, even if you don’t believe it, that’s a choice too. I have left very little good on this earth so far and if I were to die today, I wouldn’t be proud of the legacy I’ve left behind. What would they say at my funeral?
I apologize if that came off a little morbid but his thought motivate me every single day. I want my parents to smile with pride and shed tears of joy before their time here is over. God knows it’s been the opposite for too long. All my life I’ve promised change but never put in the actual work to fulfill this task. So now I work and I stay quiet, letting my actions speak for themselves. I have found my meaning, my purpose, and I’ content. I want to give back and that’s what I’ll spend the rest of my life doing. I’m only sorry it took so long for me to wake up.
What is the meaning of life for you? I would like to delve deeper into this question, so if you have any comments, please leave me one, an email, write, or if you have any material you think I should read, please let me know.