Society, Uncategorized

Stay Vigilant, Keep Fighting

The other day I overheard a few “white guys” complaining about their plight as white males and how no other people had it like they did, so the other races in this country should quit their whining and get on with it. How everyone is equal now, so people should just shut up and get over it.

I’m not writing today to litigate race relations in this country, I’m just using it as an example to better illustrate my point. In this current tidal wave of women coming forward to tell their stories, calling out men for their deplorable behavior and keeping crimes against women in the forefront, it seems like there may be a paradigm shift occurring in our society. But wait, not so fast.

If the 2016 election has shown us anything, it’s that there are still many unresolved issues, bubbling just underneath the surface. I remember seeing videos of kids in school telling their fellow Latino classmates to “go back to Mexico” and very angry white males screaming at rallies, as if the collective class of minorities had been persecuting them for years.

There is something changing it might even be the monumental reworking of our societal “norms,” which we need to bring about equality. But again, not so fast, let’s not be naïve and think this is somehow the end of the patriarchal society, because it’s not, not by a long shot. Men still hold all the cards.

The keys to the doors are in the pockets of very powerful men who wont just give up the status quo, which has afforded them endless benefits and power.

We must stay vigilant. This is a milestone but in no way is this e\the end of the struggle for equality. The Alabama senate race, which featured Roy Moore as the so-called paragon of virtue (his supporters words), is a clear example of how deep these patriarchal power structures are rooted in the solid of our democracy. Even women are quick to denounce a woman that accuses a powerful man, especially when politics are involved. Stay woke, keep fighting and one day we’ll get there.

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Society, Uncategorized

Traditions and Patriarchy

In any culture, it can be hard to let go of an archaic belief system, when it’s gone on for millennia. Under this current patriarchal design; customs have been cemented in, laws have been written to suit the power structures and wars have been fought in the name of male deities to keep in place and justify these outdated ideologies. But to what end?

What is our purpose here? What are we moving towards with these beliefs, these systems we’ve created and now calcified into the bones of our communities? We can’t be afraid to question and stand up to these structures of power and domination. We can’t allow ourselves to become complacent and no better than those who hold the keys. Just because millennia of male-centric ideals have ruled the world, does not mean it’s the best way or even the right way. Look around the world, this can’t be humanity at its best.

Virginia Woolf once asked, “What is ‘civilization’ in which we find ourselves? What are these ceremonies and why should we take part in them? What are these professions and why should we make more out of them? Where in short, is it lending, the procession of the sons of educated men?”

Men, we’ve had our chance. Don’t fear living in a woman’s world, let’s be equal partners in creating a better future. It’s okay. Let’s give them the keys and let them drive.

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Uncategorized, Writing

Painting our Imperfections

“I know the pain of wanting to be changed and yet being distrustful of changes, of wanting to be worked on, but being suspicious of the intentions of the worker… However, messing it may be now, however confusing and scary it appears, however endless the task may seem, we will some day be beautiful, glorious, alive! There is much tearing out to do- a lot to give up. No thin coat of new paint, no shallow, pretty piety will do. It’s not good enough to cover up imperfection, it must be corrected… These things take time.”

-Brennan Manning

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Life Lessons, Uncategorized

Fearless

Fear can manifest itself in so many ways. It’s not always an extreme, an overwhelming emotion, sometimes it’s imperceptible and you don’t even know it’s holding you back.

I’ve gotten so much better these past few years and it’s because I’ve let go of my fears in order to better embrace love; which has vastly improved my relationships, stoked my compassion and dramatically altered my outlook on life.

Yes, there are a few things that remain, but I take them in stride and tackle them head on. You have to keep your subconscious clean, otherwise your fears and negative emotions will build up and like a clogged drain, eventually cause problems. As in biology, even the smallest things can become a substantial problem, if we don’t stay cognizant of triggers in order to prevent unnecessary disharmony in our lives and keep us striving towards excellence without ambivalence.

So, I’m taking my time, trying to better understand myself and live in the moment. I’ve had a creative renaissance this past year, so I’ve taken advantage by working overtime on some writing projects dear to my heart. A lot of research! Another reason for my belated posts.

I’ve started my day listening to Khalids, “Young, Dumb, and Broke,” and I’m fearless. I  am rediscovering the boy my parents raised to be honorable,  the one with a ready smile and a positive outlook on life.

I know things are easier said than done, especially after a lifetime of programming and deep rooted habits, but you must try. Take a small step, let go of one small fear and don’t be afraid to stumble. You never know what may come of it. Be fearless.

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My Story, Uncategorized

I’m back

So I’ve been gone for the past few months. I haven’t stopped working, nor have I forgotten about my promise to continue on this journey, however hard it gets. I’ve just paused for a moment in order to better reflect and chew over what I’ve been doing these past few years.

I see now that it’s good to take a break from time to time, so you can look back to make sure you haven’t veered from your chosen path. Because even the slightest deviation can turn into a very consequential departure from the path you originally set on. You don’t want to be lost in a forest of bad b\habits and negativity again.

I’m a narcissist, a manipulator, or at least I was; or maybe I still am, somewhere deep inside. That’s the thing, how do you truly know? I feel like I’m better, my mind is clearer, my thoughts are positive, and my love has grown exponentially. Yet, there can be triggers, so you have to be conscious of these and every once in a while “check the books,” like some forensic accountant, to make sure there aren’t any discrepancies.

So I’m back. I feel great and I hope all of you are well but if this finds you struggling with something, remind yourself of a little thing my boy Buddha once said, “Each day we are born again. What we do today is what matters most. Each moment is another opportunity to do the right thing, to laugh, to love and be great.”

So what are you waiting for?

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Womens Issues

Delving Deeper

When I started this I was searching for answers. Answers to my own questions, the ‘why’ of my actions and ways in which i could eventually give back and hopefully make a difference.
In my search I’ve come across some good books, research material and ideas that have made me want to dig deeper into the underlying structures of our society and do-called cultural norms that have been best-case a disadvantage and worst-case, devastating for women. So I haven’t been writing as much lately because I’ve been trying to delve deeper in order to better understand the problems and how better to approach these issues, even if its just through my writing and what I teach my son. Luckily the conversation has picked up, whether in Hollywood or politics, women are being listened to and hopefully this wont just fade into memory like so many other things in this era of 24 newscycles. It must be a tidal wave.

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